SUPERMAN #0

STORY: Scott Lobdell
ART: Kenneth Rocafort

"What started out as mild scientific curiosity has become a matter of life and death!"

Oh my god, Scott Lobdell.

Scott Lobdell, oh my god.

The above quote might possibly be one of the absolute worst lines of dialogue I've ever read in a comic book. That's saying something with the sheer amount of content out there. Then again, Scott Lobdell is not one for subtlety. In fact, he seems stubbornly against the idea that he should write as if a normal person were speaking, instead content to pen words that feel like an old man - obviously out of his comfort zone - trying to be witty, retro, and modern all at the same time, only to come up short in every department...oh, wait.

Honestly, I don't know what Scott Lobdell should be writing. His penchant for writing inexplicably blunt and wooden doesn't seem to have a place in modern comic books outside throwback stories meant to resemble books from the 1950s and 60s. He certainly shouldn't be writing Teen Titans, Superboy, or Superman, the first two of which he helmed for the past year, and the latter of which he's just been given.

Superman #0 is painful. So painful, in fact, that I found it hard to actually read the entire issue. Lobdell had a chance with this prequel issue to start things off right with his run on Superman, and he squanders it just as badly as he did with Superboy and the Teen Titans (but, strangely enough, not like Red Hood and The Outlaws, which has been uncharacteristically good under Lobdell's watch). Superman's parents are part of the Kryptonian elite, a class that resembles our own humanly aristocracy from the Victorian era through the early 20th century. I get what Lobdell is trying to do, but in trying to write the citizens of Krypton like upper class snobs, he's made them all read like morons who just learned the finer points of diction and syntax and decided to have a field day. "So pensive you are tonight, Jor,", "...everyone within a three-arc radius of the CRC are, simply put, no more," and, "I would like to think that our days spent discussing continuum particle theory and our sweat-soaked nights spent on the magma cliffs of Corga had a...lasting impression," are just some of the outlandishly terrible lines littering these pages.

One of the biggest draws to Superman #0 was the supposed reintroduction of Oracle, the moniker taken by Barbara Gordon when she was paralyzed by the Joker and confined to a wheelchair. But of course, Lobdell makes readers froth at the mouth for nothing, and gives us some alien behemoth capable of blowing the weird extraterrestrial horn first seen in Superman #1. Sure, it gives a bit more credence to the horn's significance in the greater DC context, but as a 'cool twist' at the end of this terrible, terrible issue, it's so much more of a letdown than anything else. The only saving grace for this issue - and I'm assuming subsequent issues - is Kenneth Rocafort's art, which has always been good in Red Hood and The Outlaws, and continues to be quality work here in Superman.

I don't even want to keep writing about this issue. Such a fail.

GRADE

F

SUPERGIRL #0

STORY: Michael Green and Mike Johnson
ART: Mahmud Asrar

For as good as Supergirl has been, it's starting to become a bit long in the tooth. I know that's a heavy accusation to make, but it comes after a few months of so-so issues, this entertaining yet oddly unsatisfying "Issue Zero", and the anticipation of the upcoming "H'el on Earth" crossover between Superman, Superboy, and Supergirl. It's an odd time for this series, and it shows. Last week's Superboy #0 was a steaming pile of crap that really wasn't worth the read. Supergirl #0 manages to one-up it's male equivalent in every possible aspect, even if it wasn't hard to accomplish in the first place. "The End of the Beginning" is a misnomer, somewhat, as it's a story about the 'end' of Krypton, as well as the 'beginning' of Kara's decades-long journey to become Supergirl of Earth. In reality, it's the 'beginning of the beginning' of Kara's new life, and (arguably) the 'beginning of the end' of Krypton. Oh, diction and syntax - you've reared your fascinating little heads yet again. But enough about the grammatical technicalities of the English language.

Supergirl #0 takes readers back to Argo City on Krypton - the most advanced and prosperous city on the planet, envied by all others. Part of the city's success is attributed to Zor-El's genius power generators that provide limitless energy to all peoples of the city. Though Michael Green and Mike Johnson don't just make him come out and say it, there are heavy implications that Zor-El's generators are responsible for causing the damage to the interior of the planet, resulting in a global increase of earthquake activity. As we all know, Superman's dad - Jor-El - was the one who discovered that Krypton was dying. At first, it seems like Zor-El is just clued-in, and simply wants to save his family. After a few pages and some shifty behavior, it becomes evident that Zor is to blame for the destruction of Krypton, hoping that the force field he built for Argo City would hold against the eruption of an entire planet and earn the errant scientist his presumed redemption. Of course, part of his delusional self-fulfilling prophecy concerns making sure his daughter gets out alive.

Similar to Jor-El's ship for his son, but a lot more eggy, Zor-El places his sleeping daughter into the pod in preparation to send her off-world to orbit a yellow sun until she could be retrieved. The situation becomes a questionable again when Zor is forced to drug his own daughter to see through his plan. Green and Johnson do an excellent job portraying the slowly unhinging Zor-El as he gets closer to his endgame and loses more of his grip on reality.

In a rather surprising twist, Kara's mother - Alura - is visited by none other than...Superboy? With no explanation whatsoever (not even an Editor's Note telling me to wait until next week or anything!), the person who looks exactly like Superboy warns Alura to seek out her daughter and say goodbye. Alura arrives at her husband's lab right as he's about to close the pod and launch Kara into space. Alura shoots Zor-El and attempts to retrieve her daughter before a dying Zor launched the pod. Honestly, this was the biggest letdown of the issue, and it's a big letdown because it's the climax of the entire issue. For the past twelve months, Green and Johnson have done a great job with emotional nuance. The entire scene between Zor-El and Alura is an emotional bombshell that acts as a catalyst for the entire Supergirl series. At least, it's supposed to be.

Green and Johnson drop the ball here, and the entire sequence comes across and hollow and meaningless, mostly because we only know Zor-El as a nutjob now, and we don't know Alura at all. Sure, there are universal human stories at play here, and sometimes that's enough. Unfortunately, Supergirl #0 needed a bit more detail and characterization for a scene like this to work, and it just didn't. It's a painful end to an otherwise solid issue. I'm still looking forward to Supergirl in the future because we'll likely never have to deal with either Zor-El or Alura directly ever again, so it's of no consequence, HAHA!

GRADE:

C+

(COMIC) SUPERGIRL #8

STORY: Michael Green and Mike Johnson
(GUEST) ART: George Perez and Bob Wiacek


Last month, Supergirl finished up it's fantastic first arc, "Last Daughter of Krypton", in which she woke up on Earth, went in search of Krypton, and fought the four Worldkillers created by Kryptonian scientists. It was a fun (if not somewhat fragmented) story that gave Kara a solid, well-written origin. Supergirl has been written and re-written so many times (the 'New 52' Supergirl technically counts as Volume 6) that it's hard to keep her continuity straight, even for die-hard fans.

This month sees the the reboot of a Superman villain who has received mixed reviews since 1987: Silver Banshee. Exhausted from her fight with the Worldkillers - and with nowhere to go anyway - Supergirl becomes surrounded by Metropolis police looking to arrest her. A young Siobhan Smythe intervenes, shouting that it was Supergirl who saved the city. After a short kerfuffle and a quick getaway, the girls bond when Siobhan learns to speak Kryptonian after hearing only a few short sentences from Kara, a gift for languages some people possess.

Siobhan gets Kara set up with street clothes and they head out to a bar where Siobhan is playing an acoustic guitar set. Usually, I'm a big fan of George Perez's artwork - it often reminds me of Silver Age books without seeming cheesy or overdone - but the pencils of Siobhan's performance make her look like she's drowning or making a "cooooo" sound with her mouth. Also, the silver lettering that identifies her singing are drawn jagged and nigh-broken looking. This is the kind of font I'd expect from a withered, old sorceress who cackles and sounds like a crow - not from a young Irish woman who claims she has a pretty voice.

Michael Green and Mike Johnson have created a whole new character for Supergirl, a way to make Silver Banshee more than a simple third-tier villain. Black Banshee arrives at the club, using his dark magic to stir up chaos in efforts to find his daughter, Silver Banshee, and in the confusion, Kara loses Siobhan. Of course, fans already knew who Siobhan was the moment she showed up earlier in the issue: Silver Banshee. Green and Johnson leave the issue on a cliffhanger for next month when it looks like Supergirl will team up with Silver Banshee, something I never thought I'd say.

GRADE:

B+

Review: Action Comics #5

Review


Action Comics #5
Grant Morrison - Writer
Andy Kubert - Pencils

Oh, how I was so getting into Action Comics. Grant Morrison was finally finally finally telling a story that wasn't convoluted in a ridiculous amount of intertwining plot lines and indecipherable head-nods to background images from five issues prior. I love Grant Morrison's writing, however gunked up it can get. And for the first four months of the relaunch of Action Comics, Morrison and Rags Morales had been retelling Superman's origins with such vigor and focus that it's been one of my favorite titles of the new 52. Many fans and critics have lambasted Clark Kent's new 'everyman' costume that he (apparently) wore for the first few years of his revitalized origins, so this issue will make them happy, as Superman's only real appearance is the final panel where he poses in all his Kryptonian-armor glory.

Issue #5 of Actions Comics goes back to the beginning, with Andy Kubert taking the reigns on the penciling side. On Krypton. Again. And this time, Jor-El purposely sends his son to a planet where he will be a god! This minor detail marks a HUGE change in Clark Kent's history, a rare chance to reinterpret not only Superman's look and demeanor, but also his moral character and ethical mission. Before, Kal-El has always arrived on Earth by mistake, making his actions benevolent for a planet that could have been any planet, really. Maybe this detail has been used in past reinterpretations, but in the new 52, it makes a lot of sense. Superman's overall attitude has undergone a drastic shift away from general politeness and sincerity towards a snarky sarcasm and big ego. It's a change I've liked so far and am curious to know how it will play into future stories as well as crossovers and Justice League arcs.

Anyway, most of the issue is dedicated to showing Krypton esplodin'. That's about it. So unless you've enjoyed reading the scientific jargon and every Kryptonian ever saying "Oh, Jor-El, you silly coot!" every other time Superman's origins have been retold, you can mostly skip about 26 of the pages of the entire issue. The parts about the Kents are necessary and respectably done. Unfortunately, the same can't be said about the back-up story about the history of Jonathan and Martha Kent, one that goes the extra distance to make their relationship hinge all the more on some 'miracle' that come in the form of a space baby. Why can't the Kents be simple? Why does their life have to include various hints at some biblical connection to something greater? Ugh. It's exhausting.

Issue Grade: C+
Art Grade: A


I'm a huge fan of the Kubert brothers, so anything they draw is automatically given a 'kudos' from this journalist.